I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
