Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Randomize
