He asked me if I "almost moaned"
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
God, you're like boner-b-gone
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Randomize
