if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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