I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
Randomize
