I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
I wish Morgan Freeman narrated my life.
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
Randomize
