my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
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