After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
So many bounce houses so little time
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Randomize