the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
