hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
