Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
Randomize
