your room smells of hookers.
And success
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
Randomize