She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
