i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
she looked like the before picture.
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
Do you have feelings for this penis?
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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