Walk of Shame. In a state park.
i just told my mom tuesday boozeday rhymes so that she can remember not to text or call me on wednesday mornings
youre going to kill that woman one of these days
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
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