We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
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