i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
I could make wine with my vomit
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
I have so many feelings about this burrito
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