haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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