Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
Randomize
