if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
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