been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.