even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
Randomize
