Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
Randomize
