dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
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