I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
go do what you do best...puke behind churches
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
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