I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
I just realized I use Twitter to keep of track of when I get drunk.
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
