p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Randomize
