oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
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