P.S. I can't hear my feet
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
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