one two three fourrrrnication!
maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
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