Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
Four minutes until I can fart!
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
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he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
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Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
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