I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
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