He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
Randomize
