What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
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