Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
We don't watch enough power rangers
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
I have already put on my inside pants.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
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