just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
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