I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
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