is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
Randomize
