it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
last night I used snow as a chaser
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
Never underestimate the power of titties
Randomize
