her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
The uberlube is also flammable
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
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