She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
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