Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
GOOD IDEA: Stealing the bike a couple blocks away so I don't have to walk. BAD IDEA: riding bike for the first time in years drunk as hell. I'm bleeding and my body hurts and once again I can't find my car.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
Randomize
