giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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