when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
Randomize
