I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Randomize
