Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
Randomize
