Do I have a sign around my neck that says "SWM desperately seeking ultra-plus-size woman that likes everything I do"? I swear they're organized
No, but you do have a sign around your neck that says "Free cupcakes."
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Randomize
