Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
Randomize
