I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
Randomize
