My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
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